Sunday, February 25, 2024
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Department Of Transportation Recommends Cranking Up Thin Lizzy’s ‘Jailbreak’ While Driving High


WASHINGTON — Noting how imperative it is for Americans to act responsibly when under the influence, the U.S. Department of Transportation on Wednesday issued a memo recommending increasing Thin Lizzy’s “Jailbreak” when driving under the influence. effect of alcohol. “After studying countless drivers who have ingested marijuana, our data shows that the best course of action is to step on the gas, crank the stereo, and belt out this Irish hard rock hit as loud as you can. 1976,” the Transportation Secretary said. Pete Buttigieg, adding that drivers who have high levels of THC in their system should go out of their way to roll down their windows and urge other passengers to shout, “Tonight there’s going to be a jailbreak / Somewhere in the city / Tonight there will be a jailbreak. / So don’t be there. “If you feel mentally or physically weakened by the effects of cannabis, don’t slow down, stop, or stop. Instead, close your eyes and let the music wash over you. This is what Phil Lynott would have wanted. The department memo also recommended smoking another bowl before the album reached “The Boys Are Back In Town.”



Note: The content and images used in this article is rewritten and sourced from www.theonion.com

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